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sharonluong
life is always better with color & IN color ♥ Age: 19 Status: Single __112210. Location: New York City Job: iSell Korean Circle Lenses; otherwise unemployed *See the WHITE DIAMOND to the left of the banner* |
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Wednesday, April 16, 2008,6:59 PM
I have nothing to say.
And I still have nothing to say, yet I feel like I should have something to say. But you see, the thing is, I have nothing to say anymore, because I'm truly sick of the shit you put me through. You say one thing, then you go and contradict yourself by doing the shit you said you didn't want to do. You would forgive her for what she's done to me, but I would never forgive her for what she's done to you. This statement applies to a lot of people in my life, and it really shouldn't. Countless times, I've felt stabbed in the back by the same people, over and over again, in the past month. Maybe we're just really not cut out to be friends. I said that like two weeks ago, but I guess I was willing to try again, but to no avail. Things are still the same as it was and I don't sense a change. What, am I supposed to be the one to force you to see that changes need to be made? Uhm, no. I've done that too many times already, even though not for this situation, and it's time that you finally learn to accept reality and face it, instead of trying to live in your fake attention-monging world. It's okay though. I think I'd be fine without you. It's not like you've ever been there for me anyway, as much as you think you were. If I'm not accepted in your fake ass world, I'm fine with that. But I think I've been long out of it anyway; I've learned to accept reality way before your world was even created, plus I can feel the sense of pushing me away. I'm not pushing myself away. You pushed me away, when you started testing my patience. Shrinking back into my nothingness is a million times better than trying to be apart of your fakeness, because even when I'm with you, I feel like nothing anyway. Jealousy is one of the seven deadly sins, my dear child. All these times, I feel like we're miles and miles apart, even if we're separated by a wall. That sounded so sappy and as if I were talking to a lover, but NO, I'm not. The way you act affects the way people look at you. And with the way you've been acting, heh, I look at you under a whole different light now. And if you're gonna try to argue that I've been acting differently, no bitch. I just stopped living my life trying to be a decent friend because you never even tried to be; and if I do act differently, take a video of yourself and the way you act during the day. You'd be surprised at how you would look at yourself too. I'm not trying to change you. They say, "If you can't change a person, accept him/her." But I don't want to accept you. Anymore. Not everything is always about you. It's okay though, I know you're not a horrible person just because you do horrible things. Go on, assume this is about so and so, or that this is about you. I'll just sit and laugh at you. |
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