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sharonluong
life is always better with color & IN color ♥ Age: 19 Status: Single __112210. Location: New York City Job: iSell Korean Circle Lenses; otherwise unemployed *See the WHITE DIAMOND to the left of the banner* |
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Monday, May 30, 2011,1:29 AM
So like, I'm glad that you're all goody-goody with everyone, but thanks for trying to keep our friendship. Nice to know that you're still the same - you come first, and as long as everyone likes you, you're good. Good-friggin'-bye, CTC ; all of you. Thursday, May 5, 2011,8:28 PM
No more - for real this time.
Okay, so now that I know that you do still keep up with my blog, I have a lot to say to you...ish, or not? I promise, this will be my final word to you. On this blog. Definitely this time. It's not that I don't want to grab lunch and catch up, but I'm a little afraid where it would go after. I know, if I'm definite about what I've decided, there's nothing to be scared about, right? Well, even still, I'm a little afraid. We are friends, and that's all it's going to be. I have new friends, and I hardly hang out with Chinatown Crew anymore because to say truthfully, aside from the select few, the people in Chinatown Crew aren't my friends - they're yours. Well, they're most definitely not mine because even though I sat down with them at Mama's recently, I sat through a certain someone's bullshit, and I didn't even do or say anything. So on the real? This whole Chinatown Crew thing - I'm like done with. Point being, I have new friends now, new heartfelt memories, new emotions, new feelings. The only thing you can do for me is be my friend - and be happy for me for anything, whether a new relationship, or whatever; and I have already decided that I'd do the same for you. As a friend, I'm going to support you in everything you decide to do, but also give you my opinions as I see it for whatever situations - that is, if you would like that. You said, "All or nothing," but I hope you've changed your mind about that, because we won't be "all" anymore. Since we broke up, for whichever reason, I didn't know what I wanted - all I know is that I didn't want to wait for you anymore. I waited so long already, and even though you say it was not too late, I just don't want to wait anymore. I knew I just wanted to be treated the way I wanted, by a person who is already that way - that he won't need to change to fit what I wanted, and you just weren't it. I clearly hung onto something that wasn't working, for far too long. Enough about the past, and explanation for what happened and why it happened. I see and hear that you're going through tough times, but you have a lot of friends that you can confide in - I mean c'mon, look at that list of people that you listed. I hope that your mom gets better, whatever she's going through; she had always, always treated me so, so well. You will get through everything - it's not about whether you "deserve" it or not. As hard as it really is, you can't let these things get to you. You already know - you never let things get to you, and you always stopped me from starting unnecessary fights over something people said or did. So now you just have to help yourself get through it - no matter how much others are offering their help, if you don't want to be helped, then there's no one to help you anymore. I will always be one call, one text, one email away; I will be there if you need someone; The same way I would be if any friend needed me. Just take care of yourself... And be happy - Not fake happy, because I KNOW you're not genuinely happy now. I can say for myself, that I'm happy now. I was questioning in my last post, but now, I know for sure that I am happy, with myself, with whoever I'm with, and every choice I have made thus far. And you should be too. We will grab lunch one day this summer. Maybe. If not, then gradually, some time later, okay? Love much, Sharon
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